I am one of the 3 "Walker girls." We were born in 1960, 61, and 62. This was way back in the dark ages when women were still expected to stay home to take care of the kids and girls were forced to wear skirts or dresses to school. We were taught how "ladies" were supposed to behave and that our purses and shoes should always match. But in our house we were taught so much more. My dad played a very special role in our upbringing. He really didn't treat us much different than most dads treat their boys. He expected us to push hard in everything we did, and didn't allow excuses. I remember when I was very young, he would stand in the big pool at our swim club and tell me to dive in. I was supposed to swim to him. Every time I would get close, he would keep backing up, until I had swum the entire length of the pool. It was a 25 meter pool and I wasn't even 5 yet, but I did it because he expected me to. 

Another time we went canoeing in the Delaware River, above the gap. We were all still very young and all were strong swimmers at this point. He loaded us into the canoe and took us to the middle of river. He jumped out, tipped the canoe, and swam to shore. While he was swimming he yelled to us to figure out how to get the canoe to shore and get the water out of it. Not only did we have to master the physical task, but we had to work together to accomplish the goal. 

When I got older, he was my driving teacher. I was pretty fearful of driving a car and he taught me to make my intentions known and then commit to the action. I still hear him in my head every time I pull out into heavy traffic and feel a little anxious. But just learning to drive wasn't enough. He made me learn to change a tire all by myself and change the oil. I have used these skills many times and am so thankful that I can be self-reliant when necessary.

My dad was a volunteer fire fighter for many, many years and sold firetrucks. We tagged along with him to the firehouse and even to a couple of fires. I don't think my mom approved, but he knew we could handle it. He took us to his office, to the firetruck plant and even to the Fire Chiefs' Convention. These experiences gave me such confidence as I entered the workforce and encountered male-dominated cultures. I can hold my own in the best and worst of company. This was possible because my dad let me watch him handle all kinds of people.

My dad never referred to us as "princesses." We were his daughters and were expected to be strong, tough, and self confident. Together with him we camped, swam, skied, learned car maintenance and cleaned gutters. We are all so lucky to have a dad who expected so much of us.

Happy Father's Day!

Kudos to Newark NJ Superintendent of Schools Cami Anderson for refusing to join the circus. Last month, at the monthly School Advisory Board meeting, Anderson was the recipient of a highly choreographed circus event, including personal, venomous attacks. Unfortunately, these types of events have become much too common under the guise of school board meetings. After having experienced these many times myself, I can tell you they are rarely a spontaneous uprising of concerned community members. They are political events, with speakers chosen and prepped to provide a narrative intended to achieve a predetermined consequence. A careful analysis of the players involved and their interactions when they are away from the microphone usually reveals collusion among political leaders and individuals who may be disgruntled in the workplace. These individuals are often recruited by the political leaders, by providing them with a forum to unleash their anger for previous disciplinary actions against them. 

After Anderson experienced this vitriol last month, certainly caused by anti-reform groups who are opposing charter schools and the closure of schools, she decided enough was enough. So this month, instead of joining the circus, Anderson issued a statement declaring she would no longer participate: 

"We have come to realize that one particular venue—the monthly meetings chaired by NPS’ 
School Advisory Board (SAB)—are no longer focused on achieving educational outcomes for 
children. The dysfunction displayed within this forum sets a bad example for our children, and 
it’s no longer a place where meaningful interaction and dialogue occurs between NPS and the 
public. As a result, Superintendent Anderson and the NPS Leadership team will no longer 
attend these meetings until the SAB can commit to ensuring a space conducive to open 
dialogue with the community."
 
I was particularly pleased that she included the statement about the bad example these meetings have set for Newark's children. During the many circus experiences I have endured, what was most upsetting was the eventual inclusion of our district's children. The most striking example of this was during a hearing for a teacher who was appealing a decision of non-renewal of his contract. This teacher chose to have the hearing in public because he wanted to the community to understand what was happening to him. As he made his case and others commented on his performance, audience members cheered and jeered as they would while watching a spectacle under the big top. In the audience were many of the teacher's high school students, who eventually joined in. This man's career was hanging in the balance and people were hooting and hollering. 

In a democratic society we have an obligation to prepare our children by teaching them to engage in discourse with passion and integrity. Instead, many public bodies are experiencing the pure venom of small political factions who will do anything to get their way. Children who participate in events created by these factions learn that it is okay to make personal attacks, to lie, to reduce the dignity of professionals, to disrespect public officials, and to just be plain mean. Is this good preparation for democracy? Thank you Cami Anderson for refusing to join the circus. Hopefully more leaders will follow your example.